Don't Retract Pack

Mary's Real Raw Birth of Baby Jesus



sometimes I wonder
if Mary breastfed Jesus.
if she cried out when he bit her
or if she sobbed when he would not latch.
and sometimes I wonder
if this is all too vulgar
to ask in a church
full of men
without milk stains on their shirts
or coconut oil on their breasts
preaching from pulpits off limits to the Mother of God.
but then I think of feeding Jesus,
birthing Jesus,
the expulsion of blood
and smell of sweat,
the salt of a mother’s tears
onto the soft head of the Salt of the Earth,
feeling lonely
and tired
hungry
annoyed
overwhelmed
loving
and I think,
if the vulgarity of birth is not
honestly preached
by men who carry power but not burden,
who carry privilege but not labor,
who carry authority but not submission,
then it should not be preached at all.
because the real scandal of the Birth of God
lies in the cracked nipples of a
14 year old
and not in the sermons of ministers
who say women
are too delicate
to lead.

-Kaitlin Hardy Shetler

Artwork by Natalie Lennard - Miss Aniela: MissAniela.com

Mother's Account Disabled for Tandem Nursing Photo

Anthony Wanosik writes:

My wife's [Facebook] account was disabled because of this picture! She did a good thing, and Facebook is punishing her for it! Help spread the word.


Thank you for nursing in public! Breastfeeding encouragement cards to share with mothers you see at Etsy.

Breastfeeding Community




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What Friendship Looks Like - Mom Support


This is what friendship looks like.👇🏼

I am currently walking through the hardest season of my life, and as mamas we feel like we’ve always got to put on our big girl pants and just muscle through. Never let ‘em see you sweat, right?

Oh girl... if there’s one thing this season has taught me, it’s that that sort of lie is terribly dangerous to believe.

I needed my people today. I thought I just needed to call them up and cry about what was happening, and then while on the phone, my sweet friend asked me such an important question. She asked me to just say what I needed and wanted most. I told her that I didn’t want to be alone. Her response, "I’m on my way."

I started in with all of the reasons she couldn’t and shouldn’t come...

My house is a disaster.
I don’t want to burden you.
It’s such a long drive.

 Her response, "Sister, I don’t care about any of that. You said you don’t want to be alone, so I’m coming." Not only did she make the trek from Greeley to Fort Collins, but she picked up another sweet friend along the way.

They picked up lunch, they walked into my house, gave me the biggest hugs, and asked, "What can we do?"

My disaster of a house? They helped me clean it and assured me it wasn’t that bad.

They let me cry, they made me laugh, we listened to music, and most importantly... I. Wasn’t. Alone. 💕

Mama, if you’re going through a rough season... know that you don’t have to do it by yourself. You don’t even have to know what you need — just start by asking to not be alone. I know there is someone in your life who will say to you, "I’m on my way" if only you’d ask.

And Mama if you have a friend who you know is going through it, just offer to come and be there with her. Actually, don’t offer...just tell her you’re coming. Because I guarantee she wants that more than anything, and she’s having a hard time being able to say it.

Praying for all of you walking the tough roads right now... whatever that may look like for you, know that you’re not walking it alone! We love you, Mama!

-Northern Colorado Moms Blog

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She is Listening, She is Watching YOU



Because she is listening.
She is watching.
She is taking it all in.
And she will remember...
everything.

-Lisa Marie


Be kind in the way you speak to yourself, in the way you speak about yourself.

Your self-image builds your child's self-image. Give her wings to fly, and not shackles to break free from.


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Peaceful Parenting Community




When you yell at your daughter "out of love"


"Every time you tell your daughter you yell at her out of love, you teach her to confuse anger with kindness, which seems like a good idea until she grows up to trust men who hurt her 'cause they look so much like you." -Rupi Kaur, 'To Fathers With Daughters' - https://amzn.to/2zLBNpj

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Broken Birth Practices - Hospital Tour: Imma Head Out...


Earth's Natural Touch: Birth Care & Beyond in Bridgeport, Connecticut, put together this meme collection of broken birth practices and the responses from the mother who owns her birth. It's your body, your baby, your birth. You have the right, Momma, to know everything about your birth team, and birth location, and be picky in your selection process.











Pregnant Moms Due This Year (more mainstream)

Birthing (more holistic)

Peaceful Parenting Community

Research EVERYTHING when you are expecting.


Cosleeping, Breastfeeding Mom Life...

Falling asleep in a cute tank top...
Waking up in a cute tank top.

😅 Especially for the cosleeping, breastfeeding mommas here! 😉💕

Art by Loryn Brantz Books and Illustration: https://www.lorynbrantz.com/

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Latch on cards for awareness raising available at Etsy

Grandmother Nurses Her Grandbaby


Vietnamese grandmother nurses her grandchild after relactating, common in many parts of the world today, and throughout human history.

Photo via @melissajeanbabies

Related Reading: 

Induced Lactation: http://www.drmomma.org/2010/04/induced-lactation.html

Breastfeeding my adopted child: http://www.drmomma.org/2009/08/special-gift-breastfeeding-adopted.html

My adoptive breastfeeding journey: http://www.drmomma.org/2010/10/my-adoptive-breastfeeding-journey.html

The Protocols for Induced Lactation A Guide for Maximizing Breastmilk Production: https://www.asklenore.info/breastfeeding/induced_lactation/protocols4print.shtml

The Breastfeeding Community (group)

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Doctor Bans Doulas From Attending Births


As publicly composed by Exposing the Silence

ICAN of Huntsville shared the post circulating the web of the obstetrician's office who posted a sign stating that the practice would not work with pregnant clients who hire a doula (pictured above). In their post, ICAN accurately states how disheartening it is to see care providers assume they have the authority to make a decision like that which drastically affects their clients AND is in blatant disregard to all of the evidence confirming that doulas improve birthing outcomes in general. 

Of course, there is always that one person who has to stir the pot... 

"I don't see anything wrong with this and commend the doctor's office for stating clear as day! They are people too who have their own opinions and the way they want to practice. If you don't like it, then don't go to them! It's really that easy!" 

FIRST: "...who have their own opinions and the way THEY WANT TO PRACTICE..."

Whoa. Did you hear that? This person believes that our care providers have the RIGHT and POWER and AUTHORITY to decide HOW they WANT to practice [upon your body]! Yikes. 

SECOND: "If you don't like it, then don't go to them! It's really that easy!" 

Yikes again. Obviously, this individual is extremely unaware of how insurance coverage in healthcare works, the various geographic challenges pregnant people face, as well as the PRIVILEGE to just go somewhere else...that easily! Good grief. 

As expected, this comment has a massive thread of subsequent comments in response to include...

"Patients don't run the facility, the facility runs the practice. So pick a different facility." 

"It seems most are bashing doctors for doing what they are trained to do. I mean, referring to breaking someone's water as rape is infuriating to me. I know what both are and they are not the same. How dare someone say they are." 

ICAN chimes in with: "breaking someone's water without consent could be considered rape because you are inserting your hand into a person's vagina without consent." 

To which this response follows: "ICAN uh, no. Not even close. That is not rape by any legal definition." (YIKES again!) And: "I am making the argument that doing a cervical check is an established standard of care. It's not rape. And it's also not rape if a nurse or a midwife does it in the context of providing accepted medical care." 

Full stop. Did. You. Read. That. ?? "...AN ESTABLISHED STANDARD OF CARE..." "....IT'S NOT RAPE IF A NURSE OR MIDWIFE DOES IT..." 

It's not just the obstetric model of care we are up against when it comes to basic rights for all pregnant people, folks... The belief that MDs and other medical staff have the authority over our bodies runs deep in our culture. We have generations of conditioning to unlearn. 

In related NOT shocking news, the person who made that last comment is none other than an obstetrician.

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Become Connected

Pregnant Moms Due This Year [more mainstream]: FB.com/groups/DueDateGroup

Birthing [more holistic]: FB.com/groups/Birthing

Peaceful Parenting Community: FB.com/groups/ExplorePeacefulParenting 






Dearest Mama, Thank You


Dearest Mama,

Thank you for giving me your milk, it was my favourite thing.

I loved to be near you, I felt calm and safe and happy.

I loved when you stroked my face and we looked at each other for hours.

I’m sorry sometimes I was a bit pinchy, or would fidget, I didn’t mean to hurt you, it’s just that your milk was so magical it made me sleepy.

The dreams I had that started with your milk were the sweetest.

Thank you for stopping your world to feed me, I’m so little that I won’t really remember, but I hope that you do, for always. x


Artwork and Poem By Taynee Tinsley
Etsy: Etsy.com/uk/shop/TayneeTinsley
Facebook: Facebook.com/TayneeTinsley

The Breastfeeding Community

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When a baby stops to smile...

When a baby stops nursing to smile at you, that is their way of saying, "Thanks for the yummy milk! I love you, Mom." Enjoy those special moments, because they won't last forever.


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5 Year Old Drowns in Swimming Pool Surrounded by Adults; Ends with a Miracle

By Maribeth Leeson
view Leeson's original public post on Facebook


My son drowned 3 days ago. His limp, gray, lifeless body was pulled from the pool and it was every mother's worst nightmare. He was dead. I heard screaming, and after a minute realized the screaming was coming from me. I watched in slow motion as people rushed to him, as he was laid on the concrete, as CPR was started.

A million thoughts were flying through my head as I stumbled around, not knowing what I was doing, screaming. I saw my dead baby on the ground. I thought about his twin brother and how could his life go on without his twin. I saw my 10-year-old son, hysterically sobbing, in his bright blue swim trunks, his beautiful tan skin glistening with pool water still. His life ruined because he just watched his brother die, drowned in the same pool where he was playing. I saw my sassy little 3-year-old daughter, in her pink unicorn and rainbow suit, just watching me, confused. And how was I going to tell my husband that I let our perfect 5-year-old son drown?? It was exactly like I've read other people say in emergency situations: I thought this must be a dream, one of those dreams that you wake up sweating from, short of breath, because it was so real. Wake up! Wake up! But no, I was already awake. Then the screaming was worse. This is happening. My funny, silly, sweet, handsome, artistic, thoughtful little blondie was dead.


I finally was able to force myself to stop screaming, I ran over to where CPR continued on my precious baby. I have no idea how long it was. 10 seconds? 3 minutes? I don't know. But I ran to him and watched and cried and talked to him as my friend tirelessly and relentlessly continued CPR. He looked awful and perfect still at the same time. I watched as water and vomit poured out of his mouth, eyes swollen and rubbery looking. Then a miracle happened! I don't remember what it was first, but he showed some sign of life because several people at the same time exclaimed "there he is!" and encouraged me to keep talking to him. My friend kept working, I kept talking. He started to try to open his eyes and another round of exclamation occured. My friend said she could feel a pulse, they decided to move him off the concrete to the pool house. A million thoughts continued racing through my mind. I was sure even if he was saved, it was too late. I was sure machines were going to be doing his living for him. I was sure it had taken too long.

Everything that happened next seemed like an eternity. The ambulance took forever to get there. They tried to get an IV on the scene but couldn't. The ride to the hospital was painfully long. But my baby started coming around! He jerked his arm back with the IV needle stick! He cried! He was coughing! Somehow, my baby was still with me!


We have now been in ICU at Peyton Manning for the last 3 days. He is sitting beside me in bed right now playing with a stuffed puppy a friend brought to him and watching Captain Underpants for the 70th time. He's off all oxygen. He will very likely come home with me today. Home with me 3 days after drowning, home to live happily with his family instead of us burying him today.

The reason I'm sharing? This happened in a pool full of people. A pool full of ADULTS. I've read so many stories about kids slipping away from their parents and getting into a pool, to be found drowned shortly later. I've never considered the possibility that my child could drown right in front of people who were watching him bob up and down from the bottom of the pool to just below the surface, but didn't think he was struggling because he looked like he was PLAYING. When I found him myself, 2 feet from adults who were in the pool, my first thought was that it wasn't him, that it was someone else's kid who was seeing how long they could hold their breath. I can 100% understand why the adults who were RIGHT THERE didn't recognize that he was drowning because when I saw him, I too thought he was just a kid who was playing. What tipped me off was the kid I saw was wearing a shirt: Adam had gotten in the pool in his shirt. He doesn't know how to hold his breath. GET HIM OUT!!!! THAT'S ADAM!!!!


This was 100% preventable. The fault was MINE. He's a big 5-year-old. He has a very needy twin who makes it easy for me to forget that Adam is still 5 too and has needs that other 5-year-olds need. He's not self-sufficient even though sometimes I feel like he is because he's so capable. I didn't tell him to get in the pool without his Puddle-jumper on, but I was aware that he had. I simply told him to stay in the shallow end while I got his sister's swimsuit on, then I would be over. I thought it was fine for 5 minutes, as he could touch just fine in the shallow end, he wasn't alone because there were multiple adults IN the pool, and I'd be right next to the pool getting her suit on. Wrong. I have never ever been so wrong. He remembers what happened. He said he slipped off the edge. Based on where he was in the shallow end, and where we found him, he means the ledge from the shallow to the deep end. He said he kept going to the bottom then to the top and tried to yell "Mommy!" It kills me to hear that. It kills me to know that his last thoughts were that mommy didn't come for him. But God decided to give me another chance to do better. He gave my baby back to me. Now he knows I DID come for him.


Who knows what we'll face from here? Physically, it is beyond comprehension that he is suffering no consequences. He is asking to go back to my friend's to swim and says "this time, I'll wait for Mommy" before getting in the pool. But he yells for me every single time I'm out of his sight. He clearly has some anxiety that he didn't have before. I pray that some counseling and lots of reassurance will fix that.

I'm sharing this because I want to prevent this from happening to anyone else. Before going to any pool, first make sure your kids know not to get in until the adult who is responsible for them is ready to watch them. That sounds like common sense, but I was thinking because so many adults were present, he was fine, but those adults didn't know his swimming ability so they didn't question when he was under water. Second, KNOW THE SIGNS OF STRUGGLE! Adam didn't look like he was struggling! He wasn't splashing, thrashing, or screaming. He was simply underwater and couldn't get his head above water. Third, know CPR. I do know CPR. Could I have performed it in that moment? I like to believe I could have if I hadn't seen someone else taking charge. I like to think if I had been alone, my survival skills would have kicked in. Luckily, I don't know, because my amazing friend was busy saving him, but I do know that if I didn't know CPR, my helping him if we'd been alone wouldn't have even been a possiblity.

I said I wasn't going to share what happened. I feel so responsible (I am responsible!) because I let him get in without any sort of safety device on, and he was in before I personally was ready to watch him. But I decided to share because I see parents at pools doing these same things every single day! And I'm sharing to hopefully spread drowning awareness.

I'm also sharing to thank my friend for saving him, to thank her over and over and over. I am eternally grateful to her and will never ever be able to repay her. Ironically, I was there for her as her nurse when her son took his first breath after he was born, and now she was here for me as my son took his first breath after he died.

Please take water safety seriously. I never thought this would be me. It was me, but thanks to God and my dear friend Kristin, my son is still safely here. Learn from my mistakes so it's not you.


Adam Jeffrey Leeson, born 3/15/14
Adam Jeffrey Leeson, saved 7/20/19

I have no pictures of what he looked like when he drowned. Unfortunately I only have the image forever tattooed on my brain. I've shared a few images of him in the hospital and the most important one, the one with his guardian angel, Kristin Moon.

Please please please share this. I'm a nervous wreck to share what happened, sick to my stomach to hit "share" actually. But I feel this happened to save others. In my heart of hearts, I know other parents need to read this.


One Year Old Twins Die in Hot Car - Making 23 U.S. Child Deaths This Summer in Hot Cars


Sweet one-year-old twins, Phoenix and Luna, were found dead and 'foaming at the mouth' in the backseat of their social worker father's car after he accidentally left them in the hot vehicle for eight hours. Juan Rodriguez, a New York City social worker, parked his car in the Bronx Friday morning, before going to work at 8am at a nearby Veterans Association hospital. He returned to his car at 4pm and began driving off, before realizing that his twins were still in the backseat. When he realized they were in the back, he got out of his car screaming in remorse, and onlookers called police.

The family had just celebrated the twin's 1st birthday with a large backyard party - "complete with a bouncy house and everything" said a neighbor. "They were very good parents."

Mom of the 1-year-old twins calls the tragedy, "my absolute worst nightmare" but said that she’s standing by her husband. "I will never get over this loss, and I know he will never forgive himself for this mistake," said Marissa Rodriguez in a statement to NBC New York. "This was a horrific accident, and I need him by my side to go through this together."

Juan Rodriguez, 39, shrieked in horror and disbelief to police when he realized what had occurred, "I killed my babies!" He has been charged with manslaughter and criminally negligent homicide. But Marissa Rodriguez insisted Sunday that she needs her husband — a disabled Iraq war veteran whom friends and neighbors describe as a doting dad — as they process the shared trauma. "Though I am hurting more than I ever imagined possible, I still love my husband," said the Rockland County mom in her statement. "He is a good person and great father and I know he would’ve never done anything to hurt our children intentionally."


After this incident, 23 babies and children have died so far this year after being left by adults in a hot car.

The yearly average for the United States is 38 children and babies dying each summer in a vehicle. Last year, in 2018, 52 babies and children died in hot cars - the highest numbers ever.

While the outdoor temperature had risen into the high 80s on Friday when Phoenix and Luna were forgotten in the back seat, it only takes a temperature of 60 degrees to cause fatal conditions inside a closed car -- where temps can easily reach to 105 in just one hour, according to Consumer Reports.

Parents: take EVERY measure possible to ensure this does not happen to your children. The majority of parents or adults who forget babies or children in the backseat are loving, involved, otherwise responsible parents who never thought this could happen to them. A change of schedule, routine, miscommunication between parents, or other life stresses can increase the risk of this nightmare occurring.





Homeschooling Families: RELAX. It's summer.

By Sarah Painter


People. Relax. It's July 1st. It's summer. We homeschool.

Can we just quit with all of the preparation posts?

Can we just be moms?

Let me assure you that when your babies leave home, the last thing you are going to be concerned about is more Latin vocabulary. I understand reading a few books ahead, or listening to some books, if your year will be busy, but there is no reason to stress everyone out.

Challenge is absolutely, positively doable during the school year. And guess what? If it's not, then scale. If your life is so overwhelming that you cannot do Challenge per the guide, then scale it during the year.

There is no reason to ruin summer!

How many summers do we get in life? Eighteen. After 18, summers without stress no longer exist. If you are already living on one income, you might as well give your kids the summers you had as a kid. Ones filled with the pool, sleeping in, board games, bike rides, extra time with mom and dad, Traveling...

Building relationships and having fun with your kids IS CRITICAL.

Don't blow it off.

Enjoy summer and ease up on the school year prep. It can happen in August.

Trust me. I've been in Classical Conversations (CC) for over a dozen years. I've graduated a girl who finished her first year of college. I have four more behind her. You need the summers. Enjoy them. Relax. Read a book for fun.

Edited to add: I have ruffled all of the feathers of the planners of CC land. Just ignore my post and keep planning. No need to defend yourselves. This is a little tongue in cheek for the folks who want to join hands (metaphorically) and enjoy our summer.

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Practice Self Love

By Sarah Nicole Landry


A year ago I never could have posted this.

No way. No how. This was my shame. This was my horror.

But today, I have no hesitation. No nerves. No “oh my gosh what will they say?”

Just peace.

Because I understand now. I understand that this is just the human body.

This is a body that has carried three amazing children.

This is a body that has been a range of weights swinging 110lbs in difference.

This is a body that used to feel worthless and now feels strong.

This is a body that needs to be fed with love, attention, kindness and good food.

This is a body, and through PRACTICE and EFFORT and EXERCISE in self care, I have grown to love.

This is a body that I will use to help show others that they are not alone in their bodies.

My friends, this is your life. This is your body. Whether you’re tall or small, curvy or striped, this is you.

And you are beautiful!

And it takes time to grasp these things. It’s not something that you SUDDENLY magically feel ok with, but the effort in hate is more draining that the effort in love.

So, practice. Because it took years of words, pictures of perfection and endless comparisons to create the voice inside your head to where it is today, and now it’s time to redirect. Now it’s time to fill it with new words, new pictures, and valuable connections. Now it’s time to live. Really live. With peace, and understanding. And a love that will not just fill you, but pour into others. Spreading the truths for more to know. 🔅 That self love, it’s so worth it. So, practice. ❤️

-The Birds Papaya 

FB: https://www.facebook.com/thebirdspapaya
IG: https://www.instagram.com/thebirdspapaya


Related Groups

Birthing: FB.com/groups/Birthing
Pregnant Moms Due This Year: FB.com/groups/DueDateGroup
Peaceful Parenting Community: FB.com/groups/ExplorePeacefulParenting
Public Peaceful Parenting Page: FB.com/PeacefulParenting

Photograph from The Honest Body Project


Breastfeeding After Cancer




Nikki Heying shares publicly in celebration:

6 weeks old on the left, 30 weeks old on the right.

It’s been 6 months.

Six months since I was allowed to breastfeed my son.

Six months of a hard battle against CANCER, getting poisoned with chemo that tainted my breastmilk and prevented me from nursing my infant son.

Six months of pumping every few hours and dumping every single ounce of it all down the drain, just so I could keep my supply up, in hopes of eventually being allowed to nurse my baby again.

Six months of having a dear, sweet, generous friend (Bec Nikodem) come to my house 1-2 times a week to latch my son, just so he would remember HOW to breastfeed again when I was able.

Well, here we are; I had my last chemo session in January and it’s been 35 days post-chemo. My breastmilk no longer contains any remnants of chemo in it, and last night I was able to BREASTFEED MY SON AGAIN!!!!

It’s been a long road, but I wanted to share my journey publicly in hopes that it can be shared and might inspire others in some small way.

💚 God is GOOD. The power or prayer is REAL. 💚

#normalizebreastfeeding #fcancer #breastfeeding



Related:

Healing Hubby

The Breastfeeding Group

Anti-Cancer

Chris Beat Cancer

Breasts: The Owner's Manual

The Circle Maker




Should I Nurse My Baby From Both Sides?




BREASTFEEDING - Should I offer both breasts?

Mammal mothers don't worry about minutes, milk transfer, or changing sides. They nurse as long as they feel comfortable in that position, and they change positions when they want to, or when baby stops being happy with what's happening.

Think of a breast as a 'serving.' Some babies want two servings right in a row; some fall asleep after the first one, and save the second for later. Some, who are trying to build milk supply, take three or four or more servings before dozing off.

Since you'll be nursing your baby again whenever s/he tells you they need it, it does not really matter how many servings baby takes in a row - as long as your little one is satisfied when finished. You can trust that your breasts will let you know if you're not feeding enough from one side [they will become firm/engorged.]

-La Leche League's The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding: https://amzn.to/2G9Rc7k



Texas City, Texas Nurse-In Sign in Support of Breastfeeding Mother Removed from Pool

Angie Dunn with her sign at the Texas City Nurse-In.

Angie Dunn's sign at the Nessler Family Aquatic Center Nurse-In in Texas City, Texas reads, "Out of Milk since '99, but like a good bra STILL SUPPORTIVE! #NormalizeBreastfeeding"

She writes, "It was all about that sweet mommy and her babies. She is such a nice lady. She walked up and gave me a hug and I just melted. I think things will turn around in a positive way for her and the other moms from this point forward."

Misty and her baby, 10 months old.

On June 8, 2019, breastfeeding mother, Misty Daugereaux, was forced to leave the center because she was breastfeeding her 10 month old infant. This action violates Texas law, which protects mothers and their nursing babies of any age in locations where moms are otherwise permitted to be.

Misty writes, "Stand for nothing, and you'll fall for anything. I got kicked out of Nessler Family Aquatica In Texas City today for BREASTFEEDING MY SON! First, I had a lifeguard come from behind me, as I was discretely soothing my crying baby, and told me I couldn't breastfeed at the public pool. Then the manager told me I had to cover up/follow the rules or leave. Then a Texas City Police Deputee showed up and made me leave. I’m so hurt, embarrassed and ashamed that this is what Texas City stands for. Their employees should be educated! Their manger could have used this moment to educate her staff! Yet I was escorted out with two 4 year olds and my 10m old on my hip - tears pouring down my face. My son asked, 'Momma why won’t they let you feed MAXX?' I was alone not wanting to cause a scene and scare my kids. To the momma that stood up for me: THANK YOU!"

#NIP #NursingInPublic BREASTFEEDING #AbolishLactiphobia

Bumper Stickers with YOUR year and choice of colors, available at Etsy.


Thank you for nursing in public cards to share with breastfeeding moms you see, and encourage them along the way, available for cost of production at Etsy. Let's support and lift each other up! #NursingMothersUnite




Bumper Sticker Variations other STILL SUPPORTIVE former breastfeeding moms have received.





Out of Milk Since '02. Like a Good Bra, STILL SUPPORTIVE! Normalize Breastfeeding.